No matter what part of life is involved whether its professional or personal, you will always get people who judge you for what they know or think you can do, and not for your potential. Not for your ideas, not for your imagination, not for your dreams – but for what it says on the tin as it were. For what they can see, and maybe thats partly down to you as to what you present outwardly.
BDSM is no different. Many people will judge you based on first impressions, based on how you present yourself. This girl tries quite often not to think too conscientously about that, but its far from easy to do really. We all want admiration from our peers, to be respected, for people to want to get to know us and whilst there are certain attractions to being shut off from the world, in reality, its not really what this girl’s BDSM is about. Part of it is about the showing off, the presentation, the exhibitionism, and this is all quite weird for someone who in other aspects of life is actually quite shy!
It is really one of the side effects of living this sort of kinky existence, of feeling in possession of an ability to shock and impress other people with your endeavours when in your day to day life you are just an average person who holds down a job and a household. This girl has probably said it before but sometimes it feels almost as though her kinky side is almost like a secret identity a bit like Clark Kent and Superman…mildmannered, quiet, and un-noticeable by day and well…something else more interesting at night. Though funnily enough , there don’t ever seem to be any superhero films where the hero gets cruelly and sexually tortured do there? Or not as the main part of the plot anyway!
When this girl knows she is facing a likeminded audience, she tries to portray her bdsm life like it is. She doesn’t pretend to be something that she isn’t. She doesn’t pretend to be the perfect submissive when she knows she is not, or the perfect masochist for that matter. She hopes she comes across as intelligent and articulate but beyond that what people make of this is really very subjective. Some people will be maybe turned on by what this girl writes about. Some might be repulsed. BDSM and D/s is such a subjective experience that this girl would not want to attempt to alter that nor would she want to come across as saying ‘look this how you do it alright’ because she’s not saying that. There are probably a lot of people who wouldn’t enjoy this sort of existence, just as much as there are other submissives that this girl does not really envy and yet still enjoys learning about. The whole concept of ‘your kink is ok but not for me’ and the notion of openmindedness is so very important.
There are maybe times that when people glance at a post of this girl’s and make an opinion based on that one post. That happens with blogs. Sometimes you need to read a bit further though to get a full feel of the person.
A lot of people who first cast their eye over this girl might think she’s some sort of extreme gorean. She isn’t. Gorean that is. Extreme maybe, possibly, in some people’s opinions but then not in everyones. Yeah this girl writes like *this* but that doesn’t make her follow Gor its just the writing style she uses for her blog. She doesn’t believe in the theories of Gor in any way shape of form. They are stories and thats it, and, like anything else can be used as ingredients to form your own sort of BDSM and D/s personalised recipe…and can be used as inspriation…but yet…not here. This girl’s inspirations are drawn from a wide variety of places and people – history, film, reading other people’s experiences all sorts of things sort of assembled to suit her and Grimly.
This girl has recently found another place to express herself –Kinky Sex Link
– a sort of amalgamation of bloggers and links to do with kinky sex and BDSM. It looks like it may well be a lot of fun, though very much so in the early days at the moment – but hopefully it will be another source to gain inspriation and share ideas. This post will be cross-posted there, and its probably because this is a sort of attempt at making a first imperssion that this girl thought she’d write today a little about blogging and illustrate it with some kit that is sort of typical of what it is that she *does*.
Everything this girl does is really centered on the fact that she is owned by a man who has the ability to make her fantasies jump to life, but for a little creative construction time in his shed. This girl is, essentially, a guinea pig for home made bdsm and torture creations and loving every minute of that. Her Master’s ability to make toys not only saves money, but also means that everything fits just right, works just right, and is very personal and very effective. Yep, its definately a perk of belonging to him!
One of the creations that has recently got this girl and her Master a lot of attention is the electrified wooden pony, and is one of the top things that people coming to her blog seem to be looking for. Yes, gentital torture is definately one very fun and interesting aspect of kink and BDSM, the ability to sensually inflict pain upon an area designed for pleasure and procreation is incredibly erotic and yet also extremely tormenting and has been for centuries. This girl loves the concept of erotic torture, and medieval ideas being pervertified into modern day thrills minus decapitation and maiming of course!
The idea of the pony is that its a piece of wood that hangs suspended between the legs of the victim, it can be hightened and thus give the victim the dilemma of pressure being on her sensitive parts or on her tiptoes. Its sort of a way of illustrating the whole fun of torture and torment – its going to hurt and turn you on if you do x but also if you do y,and if you do z then you are really fucked! ;)
The pony Grimly made for this girl has the added feature of being electric and the metal tape across it is life when the whole thing is hooked up to the ET312 electrical box, and, based on stroke and strength, this whole experience can go from a moderate tingle to ‘oh my fucking god’.
Now, on this particular occasion, this girl was daft enough, yes , incredibly daft, to suggest that he combine the pony with the tower of pain. The tower of pain is NOT a device she enjoys at all. It is based on the idea of nipple clamps combined with a bit of bondage that enables the clamp chain to pull out and stretch instead of dangle down. It hurts. A lot. Maybe not too much more than clamps used just on their own, but maybe the psychological torment of the bondage and of the predicament adds a little something to this as well.
This girl loves torture and bondage, and sensory deprivation and all manner of kinky activities. She is not just about doing one thing repetitively time and time again. She loves experimenting, learning new ideas and meeting new people and is currently at a totally different place with all of this than she was one year ago.
BDSM is not as much fun being stuck at one place as it is when it is progressive, and experimental.
BDSM is this girl’s drug and adrenaline, its what she does for fun, for thrills and for fantasy in a way that for her comes alive in a very real and exciting way.
Yeah…sure its an addiction, an addiction centred on practices of experimenting on what on earth her body can go through next and maybe, with some Doms, that would be a dangerous way to do this, but with someone that knows what they are doing and has the ability and creativity to keep her interested? Nah…it keeps on being different and fun and exciting :)
And here …some wooden pony pictures to leave you with…