A question by email as part of question and answer month :-
“Do you sometimes find it hard to segue into playing when “real life” constantly intrudes? Obviously you and Grimly have a much more BDSM oriented life than we do, but I find myself sometimes caught in trying to “get in the mood” and realizing sometimes it’s a little difficult when you’ve got vanilla worries to contend with.”
Short answer. YES.
Despite what everyone might think, Grimly and I don’t indulge in kink every day, not even every week, sometimes not even every month. Scandalous eh ? 😉 Real life DOES intrude. We both have elderly parents with issues, work, health and financial worries at times and all that other completely normal mundane stuff.
We’ve gone through months at a time in the past where we haven’t been in the mood, and if it appears otherwise its just because we’ve had stuff to post that we’ve done earlier and not got round to showing off. That’s life.
Here’s an example too. That, with hindsight is completely ridiculous.
I decide to go away with my subby anne o’malley for the weekend. Just a girls weekend, dinner, a theatre show, a nice hotel, maybe take some toys with us. Grimly meanwhile, is in London seeing a friend there. Prior to going away, I get a chest infection, feel like shit, don’t feel sexy, dominant, and barely functional lol. However, I decide to still go away because I don’t want to lie down to it, don’t want to let her down either. So I do, i’m nearly travel sick from the antibiotics, but get there OK.
We enjoy the dinner, and the show, and each other’s company. All pretty good. Till we go to sleep. But we can’t, the bed has collapsed in the middle and can’t be slept in. We change rooms, packing some of our stuff but leaving a lot as well at 11pm. The other room has a rock solid bed, rock solid pillows and a droning noise outside the window. Im still coughing my head off. I still don’t feel that dominant or sexy, until I get to a point where I do…somehow… 😉
After that, try and sleep again, but can’t due to the droning noise. I go and complain, half dressed at 5am. I yell at the hotel as far as I can with very little voice LOL. They agree to a refund. We go back to the original room, just because it isn’t noisy.
The next day the smiling receptionist says well we’ve agreed to a refund but you need to sort it out with the booking agent on the phone. So I phone the booking agent, but get cut off as after being on hold for 30 minutes I’ve been silly enough to phone when they’r about to close, but no its not because of that its because the ‘system is down’ I phone for another 30 minutes the next day and finally a refund is agreed to. The booking agent send me a feedback form, which I rant on, and they email me to say oh but we’ve resolved your problem …and you’re refund will be processed in 7 to 110 days. 110 days!! LOL i think this is a typo but it makes me laugh. Oh but say I, you can’t undo the fact that the hotel you encouraging me to book made me feel like shit and wasn’t suitable for a romantic bondage weekend.
Even though I was sick
Well I would have said that.