Grimly and I* had a kinky start to the year, visiting MARS which is a fetish/bdsm club and members venue near to Manchester. If this were trip advisor, it would get 5 little stars, it is a fantastic place!
First of all though I’d like to mention that I’m not writing this blog in third person anymore. I’m sorry if this makes it weird to read for anyone thats been here a while, its probably going to be weird to me too! At least for a while! Its a fresh year though so this seems to be as good a time to begin a new chapter as any.
However, as per my last blog, I’ve been quite close to doing away with writing here completely, since I’ve not done a great deal of kink lately, and what I have a lot has been more Domme than sub, and well, I just don’t really feel submissive and that whole style of writing is mostly connected to that. I think also, it originally helped me writing like that because it was detached and anonymous and sort of a bit of introverted retrospection (I think I know what I mean there!) and I’m not sure I need it to be that anymore. Originally, it wasn’t at all connected to a person who went to events, although I did. It was simply just an outlet to write about how I felt without necessarily anyone who actually knew *me* apart from Grimly knowing that it was, and certainly no one in my immediate kink community or circle of friends knowing about it. But, its kind of a good thing I suppose that most people who know me in a kink sense now know this is around, whether they actually read much of it or not!
The more time I spend indulging in BDSM the more I seem to drift away from the sub label, and I wonder if that label was ever one that I should have ever used. I’m not really all that submissive. I can be, but if I’m honest its generally only when there’s a consequence of not being! Though, I guess everyone changes or evolves, and what they like changes and develops. So what I’m saying now may be different again in a few years, or you know, a few months. lol. I’ve always been into hunting the next sensation and head trip though.
Essentially, I’m not really sure what label fits me anymore, even if there is one appropriate, i’m just what I am and nothing more. Which seems to be someone who is married to someone else who is kinky, who sometimes does kink with their husband directly, but who also sometimes ties up other women sometimes with, sometimes without the husband. LOL. It doesn’t really matter though, Grimly and I are as happy as we’ve ever been so whilst kink may not have completely been what a few years ago we thought it might, our marriage is amazing and I couldn’t be without him.
I think part of the reason why we enjoyed our evening at MARS was that it didn’t seem to matter what people were, or what label they fitted. Whether that was dom, sub, TV etc. Everyone seemed comfortable and everyone seemed welcoming and welcomed. A lot of clubs I’ve been to aren’t like that, they can be cliquey or people can be excluded, but I found it very inclusive and friendly. The venue is great too, its intimate, but it is very well equipped, and, we’ve now found a place that maybe has well , one or two, more gas masks hanging up than us. I like that encourages kink specific events as well so that people can get to go to an event that is specific for their fetish, as well as events that suit most. We will definitely be going back there, and maybe sooner rather than later.
The problem with kink though sometimes is that the ability to go to to things and buy things can sometimes be restricted by the budget. Especially at this time of year! I’m trying to be good though, I could have just bought a ‘bargain’ on Ebay and resisted! Thats not to say I haven’t got a few new ideas in the pipeline though , so, watch this space 😉