A question asked by email during this months question and answer session :-
“hi, i was wondering if you could tell me in details about your dom making you orgasm on command? i’m very fascinated”
Probably not everyone believes that being able to orgasm on command is possible, and that’s ok, because until it happened to this girl she would have thought that too.
Before this girl met Grimly she hadn’t orgasmed all that often. Her first ever boyfriend was good in bed, just penetrative sex just wasn’t really the thing that did it for her so much. She enjoyed it so much more when he would use his hands or mouth and could orgasm from that. Her second serious relationship and first dom gave her very few orgasms at all so she was used to not really having many.
It kind of got this girl to thinking that maybe she was just one of those women that doesn’t orgasm easily, there are plenty of people who find it difficult no matter how good the sex and no matter what toys are used. However that ended up not being quite true.
When this girl first played with Grimly she said to him ‘oh you wont make me orgasm I don’t easily…..’ and so, seeing that as a challenge,he made sure that she did nice man that he is. To be fair Grimly has always had enough things to use and combinations to think up that something was going to work sooner or later. For a long time this girl just enjoyed being able to have good kink driven orgasms with him, and interestingly, without even thinking about having sex, which came much later.
However, given the play this girl and Grimly share is quite tech-orientated and can involve mind control and suggestion after some time he introduced an orgasm trigger via mild hypnosis or neuro-linguistic programming. This girl doesn’t really want to go into too much detail since it spoils the magic a bit to over-analyze this kind of thing, but essentially he used a combination of bondage, electricity and sensory deprivation to make her really want to be ready to orgasm and then he would make her stop until he had counted down from ten to zero allowing a reaction on the zero. Eventually he substituted the word zero for other words and also gestures. After a while it sort of became pavlovian, which is probably not the right word for describing it but the closest.
It works of course best when it is during play and this girl is perhaps wanting to orgasm anyway, but it also can work from nothing at all but his voice. Like this girl said before, it’s up to you whether you believe that or not, all that matters is that this girl’s mind and body believes it. Since then, it is very difficult for her to orgasm without a trigger from him. It’s possible if the mood is right and the combination of circumstances, but quite honestly this girl prefers having that element of things controlled by him . After all, why wouldn’t she? It’s such an intense and sexual moment to control and to share.