This girl is NOT really a service submissive. She’s not keen on housework, or having to do tasks to exact specifications with severe penalties for failure. It’s not what she signed up for. Yet, there do seem to be a lot of D/s relationships that encorporate set rules and regulations – about things being just so. This isn’t one of those. But then, Grimly isn’t really a stereotypical Dom either.
This girl does not want the type of relationship where she needs to wait on him hand and foot, where a daily routine is in place outlining how everything should be. It would bore her. It would bore him, and most of all, there is absolutely no way she would stick to it for very long. This girl is one of those people that will do things to the best of her ability – but doesn’t like to being restricted on the *how* part. Sometimes its fun to suprise someone with a bit of initiative, a bit of free thinking and a bit of imagination.
Sometimes reading things across other blogs, it seems to not happen. Like its wrong. Like its bad to have an opinion that differs to your Dom. This girl’s views and opinons on things match up with Grimly’s on so many things…but there are times when they don’t, and sure a lot of the time he’s in the right…but sometimes he isn’t.
He isn’t with this girl because he wants someone there to make his life ‘easier’, or to have things done for him, or to not be challenged, or to know that he can get a blow job when he wants – oh apart from anything else he’s not even ever once orgasmed from that for her anyway despite her best efforts. hmmph.;)
He’s with her because she brings out the best in him and vice versa. It’s important to this girl to feel that she meets his intellectual needs as well as his needs to be in control and to be the dominant one of the partnership, and its good to have someone to discuss things with, share ideas with, and combine input. Instead of absolutely everything being one way. There are no doormat subbies here!
There are times though when this girl just wants to do things for him. Not because he says ‘do x y z in this order’ but because she wants to please him, partly out of submission maybe, but mostly out of love. Like for his birthday, this girl made the effort with a special dinner and tried her best to ensure everything else was just right too..and it felt good doing that. It felt special spoiling him because she felt like she’d actually achieved something in giving him something out of the ordinary day to day. If she dressed up as a maid every night as he came home from work and had his dinner on the table and flowers and wine he might get bored of it, and/or take it for granted.
Sometimes its good to have a special treat. So this girl can do the service thing now and again, when he wants her to or when its a special occasion …but for the most part she likes having an adult man who can take care of himself and her. Yes she is there to make him feel special, but she’s not going to do that by spoiling the pants of him. Or at least…not every day!
There are elements of the alpha male role that this girl likes of course. She likes to feel that she has someone who can protect her and look after her, and that in return she can love and cherish. Yes and obey. She just wants to keep things as they are in that the relationship is non-restrictive, and gives her enough room to do her own thing when she needs to – and he’s ok with that. This girl doesn’t recall a time when he’s really yelled at her for doing something trivial not to how he wants. She’s been in a relationship where she has been ‘pulled up’ for maybe not looking a certain way, or not making the dinner a certain way and its sort of counterproductive – it knocks your confidence and it makes you feel worthless.
This girl does not want to feel worthless.
She always tries to go the extra mile to give him what he needs from the relationship and tries to do that in a positive and happy way. Because she doesn’t feel restricted , or burdoned with rules or regulations as such she feels free enough and happy enough to do things her own way and to do things for him out of love instead of duty and obligation, and because of that she’s always happy to do things that please him and make him smile rather than because she feels she has to ….she would never want to resent being his. Maybe this girl is just a loved up masochist and not really all that submissive – but does it matter if so??
Oh besides anything else, if this girl took on a more domestic or service orientated role , Grimly wouldnt probably be able to think of enough things for her to do that he’s not happy or willing to do himself. He probably wouldnt be able to think of enough chores to keep her occupied…given that mostly if he sees something needing to be done he’ll do it himself, or just ask her and she’ll take her share anyway…too complicated to give her a whole list and string of duties .
Though you know, if he was given a maid…he would probably do extremely mad despicable things and take advantage of the situation instead of asking for something boring like a blow job or his dinner.
Maybe you’ll get to see in a few days just what this girl means 😉