Sometimes a girl just needs to put her feet up!

So, here you go – the answer to the question raised in the last post…..the most sensible thing to do whilst dressed in latex in shoes you can barely walk in whilst cooking the dinner is of course…to relax and put your feet up. Well. Yeah. Kind of πŸ˜‰

The picture shows just a little bondage and breath play, the hoses coming off the mask being attached to a bubbler bottle. Nothing unusual for a Sunday afternoon around Grimly’s really!

This sort of breath play is pretty relaxing. Maybe this girl is not alone in this, but quite often she enjoys the almost hypnotic and relaxing effects of breath play and control just as much as the sort of stricken panicked effect having someone play around with her air supply can induce. Both feelings can be incredibly erotic and effective.

That is why this girl is a firm believer in why breath play isn’t that great to be undertaken alone.

Aside from of course the extremely important safety considerations, that is.

This girl just cannot see how that can be the same without someone there in control of it, in control of the sensation. She can’t decide which type of control is more illustrative of his dominance over her. Whether its the sexual control he has over her, whether it be demonstrated physically through chastity, or mentally through orgasm control…or whether it’s this since someone having this much control over your life, whether you can breathe easily or not, is pretty powerful visually and mentally.

Also, aside from being a very visual reminder of control its also a huge reminder of trust.

This girl wouldn’t allow Grimly to do these things to her if she didn’t trust him to read her properly, to stop himself from going too far, and keeping within her capabilities and just pushing her limits enough to keep it interesting.

Its because of this, that she can relax. That she can get almost hypnotized in this sort of situation. In fact, its almost a sort of therapy. Strapped up like that, all this girl can think about really is her breathing, his control, the bondage.

The last few days or so have actually been quite stressful, so, that was kind of good to be able to relax like that.

Sometimes it feels as though this girl is under a bit of pressure, not necessarily from him, but from something, to try and fit in as much kink as possible to a relatively short time, fuck, strangely enough maybe its a bit of pressure to keep the blog going to have something to write about. That irritates her a bit, because it was never really supposed to be about that, more just really for recording a few interesting bits and pieces, rather than a chore, or to keep an audience interested.

Though, when a blog has been going as long as this one, it becomes a sort of consideration, and this whole bloody thing has maybe just inflated this girl’s ego a little too much, she never really thought this many people would be interested, but its nice, that for someone who once had pretty crappy self confidence to feel as though people are interested, even if its just to perve. lol.

Though really, deep down this girl’s BDSM is still not about that.

Its about him. About her Master.

Her frustration recently has been mostly at this whole still being in a long distance relationship thing, and in trying to cram as much into together time as possible, and that includes ‘vanilla’ stuff as well as kink. There’s never enough time, and each time this girl tries to plan longer with him, something sort of gets in the way.

She’d kind of said to herself a few days ago ‘this will be the time when i show him I can be really amazing for him, and the submissive he deserves’ and, well, it didn’t happen quite the way she expected, mainly because of the requirements of a four wheeled german nuisance. Her one this time, not his. Though, you know, if it wasn’t for cars and the ability to drive, this relationship would be a lot harder.

Despite that, BDSM happened. D/s happened. Squished in around everything else that needed to be done, but you know, thats sort of real life.

This girl is a real person, not someone living in a fantasy. The funny thing is, it probably wouldn’t be all that different if she lived with him. The kink stuff would happen when it could, and sort of be there in the background, but not the only concern.

This girl feels a bit guilty really.

She longed for a long weekend of BDSM, and it didn’t happen as much as she thought it would.

But, she doesn’t feel as bad about that as she thought she would.

Its probably been this way for a while, but, she’d just as much have his company doing normal couple things as she would being tied up and tormented. Of course, thats not to say she would want to give up what she has, she likes having both. Its just, the BDSM isn’t her main motivation for spending time with him, and it hasn’t been for a while.

It’s probably a good thing really, its probably the reason why this girl and Grimly are still together nearly four years later. If it was just BDSM, if it was just sex, even with all his toys and his devious mind, it would have fizzled eventually, the distance might have got to be too much effort for a few thrills, well yeah, ok lots of thrills – but even so, how long can a relationship last if BDSM is *all* there is to it?

Maybe, just maybe it’s the icing on the cake of something a lot more meaningful than that.

15 thoughts on “Sometimes a girl just needs to put her feet up!

  1. I got as far as the mention of the bubbler bottle and my mind wandered… I had to read the rest through again!

  2. distance sucks ass. i feel you on that one.

    is there no plan for you guys to get together 24/7 at some stage???

    sorry for being nosey, but i find myself in a similar yet different scenario, and the distance is by far the hardest part. (we have a much MUCH greater chasm to cross…once a year is all we can manage right now *le sigh* but we do hope that it will be possible at some point to be in the same time zone πŸ˜‰ )

  3. It’s really great to hear someone else comment about the “relaxing” times that this can all bring. I think far too many get entirely caught up in a view of this that makes it out to be a sexual feeling all of the time. Many don’t realize that this is our space, our comfort area, our proverbial happy place.

  4. Think of it as a fisherman does of fishing. Even a bad day fishing is a good day. When you can be together, it is good, no matter what is happening.

    As for the constant writing, as a fan I’m grateful for any posts, and feel you have given such insight into why this has worked for 4 years this way.

    I still am amazed and in awe of the creativity of Grimly. It seems that there are variations to the variations, and that you can expect the unexpected. But all with that same trust and knowledge that you are in safe, sane and sadistic hands.

    Just a suggestion would be to extend the weekends some with things like locking the chastity or an outfit on when you leave home or Grimly’s knowing the key is in your flat to open it. This way even if it is vanilla things that need to be done, there is always that lap wetness that only you two know is happening.

    Of course he could probably wire your car to help make the trip go well but remember subspace and highway driving are not always a good mix!

  5. weirdgirl, eventually yes. Feel for you about the distance in your relationship, I am technically only a half a day drive away so its not so bad, it could be worse.

    Dale, thanks, I agree, if I didn’t have this escapism I would be in some sort of nuthouse probably lol

    Tim, the chastity belt we have at the moment isn’t suitable for use longer than a few hours, given reasons of biology.

    When i leave there, I’m really not in the frame of mind that I want to do something mundane to try and keep it going. It wouldn’t work for me. I dont really get off on anything that I can control myself – like playing over the phone/net whatever. Nothing can beat hands on proper time for me.

    hmm maybe i’m an all or nothing sort of person lol

    TG xx

  6. There’s nothing wrong with being an all or nothing person πŸ™‚ I like to call it committed, (which is appropriate because I probably should be committed!) πŸ˜‰ I’m either 100% into something or I can’t be bothered at all. I agree about phone and Internet play too – just not worth the effort.

    Hang on to the thought that you’ll be able to be together eventually and carry on making the most of the time you do get.

    I know what it’s like to feel you have to cram kink into the available time, and to want so much to be the perfect partner, (though as a Domme in my case), but to have it just not quite work and to have the play time eroded by necessary vanilla tasks. Sometimes I even end up pushing myself to play and feeling guilty because it doesn’t just flow like it does when I am in the mood. I usually get into it but having to push myself so as not to ‘miss’ the available time can take the shine off a bit.

    It won’t be forever though, for you or for me. And at least you have found your soulmate. Some people go through their entire lives without knowing themselves and accepting themselves as well as you do and without finding anything as remotely good as you and Grimly share.

  7. wow… that is an awesome photo! you have an amazing thing with Grimly – both vanilla and kink – you are very lucky πŸ™‚ Long may it continue!

    Sure long-distance sucks, but am sure you know it is all worth it in the end.

    *hugs*

    t. x

  8. V, committed…funny you should say that, or do you mean institutionalized?

    Oh you know i dunno sometimes i dont mind the necessary vanilla stuff it shows we’re a real couple as opposed to two people that meet for sex and torture lol. Though…for a while we did that. lmao

    And yes, i know i’m lucky he has his quirks but i like that.

    t, thanks, i have some pictures coming up inspired by your very own Dom so watch out! hehe

    TG xx

  9. Committed, institutionalised… I’ll try most things once. Maybe a few more times just to be certain.

    Just making a note to myself to check in the brochure the quality of the restraints, before I go! Can’t have me escaping now, can we?

  10. Velvet, “you can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave”

    xx

  11. The Chastity is only good for a few hours? Sounds like a Grimly project there!

    And the concept behind anticipation or “afterglow” is to arrange it so you do not have control. If you have keys sitting in your flat that go to the lock holding something in place, or you have to lock something on before you leave your flat, where the key is sitting at Villa Grimly, then you are unable to change the situation until you arrive at your destination.

    I can hear the wheel a turnin, saying, well you could just lock that thing a block away. That should be an easy Grimly if he likes the idea, to set up you have to lock one thing to get the other key out. (technically, rf proximity like the shock collar concept would do the job nicely). He should be able to wire your car so that you only get a few minutes away from the car to turn off the signal at either location before the device “goes off” bank funny money given to a robber, or even a store security system also use principals that could be employed.

    Or just some additional conditioning that if you lied about when do you did something, a Clockwork Orange response might do the trick.

    Just trying to help keep your twisted mind and his creative hands working together in Perfekt Harmony!
    Tim

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